2011 Corperate Challenge

Next week I will be doing a 5K walk with some other folks at work in one of the events of the 2011 Corperate Challenge taking place in Indianapolis.  I'm also participating in the tug-of-war challenge, and hopefully my height and supposed upper body strength will be advantageous for once!  (My height at least!)  As exciting as doing this event is, I am a bit apprehensive about it as well.

I've always been very  nervous and uncomfortable in places where there are lots of fit, athletic people - like gyms, for example.  I'm expecting the Corporate Challenge to be no different.  There are a couple dozen people from my own work place meeting with who knows how many other people from other offices around Indy.  Not only will I be surrounded by fit people from all over the city, and the state for all I know, I'll be representing my workplace and will likely be one of the only, if not THE only overweight person there.

Another reason I kind of nervous is because I don't think I'm in as good a shape as others my size/height/weight, and I'm not in as good a shape as I'd like to be by this point in my journey.  I am very competitive and have a habit of comparing myself to others as well competing against myself, and one day, out of curiosity, I Googled how long it takes for a 300+ pound woman to walk a mile.  The answer really surprised me.  I read, in several places that it should be typical for a woman my weight to walk a mile in 15 minutes!  I'm pushing to get one in in 20 minutes on the treadmill at work!  And that's even having to take a short break or two because the sides of my calves are on fire.  (I usually don't have to do that when walking outside which is probably why I like walking/running outside so much more.)

It's disheartening to find that out because I thought, at least by now, that compared to other women/people my size, I was in better shape, and I'm working hard to continue in that track.  Today I walked around Shadyside, one of my favorite parks in Anderson and I walked about a mile farther than I usually do, but I was struggling the entire time.  My legs were burning, and I was getting winded a lot faster than I thought I should be.  I kept going, but every step was harder than my past walks.

I'm nervous because I will be surrounded by athletes at a highly athletic event and I'm afraid I will stick out like a sore thumb.  I'm discouraged because apparently I'm really out of shape even compared to other women my weight.